Charting the Unknown: My First Solo Adventure

 

Someone wise once said "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away". It's these very moments that we, as humans, yearn for in our life. I’ve recently lived one such experience that changed my view of life, of myself and the world around. It made me believe, it made me seek and it helped me look at the same mundane things remarkably. I’ve held it all in for so long that it somehow feels unfair to not put it out in the open. So, I finally decided to articulate one of the best experiences of my life. As I write this, I consider it a note to my future self and if it resonates with just one other person, I'll feel fulfilled.

Travelling, for me, has always been a transformative journey that enriches my soul and opens doors to new cultures. But this particular trip holds a very special place in my heart. This trip was not only my first solo adventure but also a long-awaited journey to a place I've dreamt of visiting forever… KEDARNATH – the abode of Lord Shiva and absolute peace. I feel there are no words in any language that are worthy enough to define this place, the magic it holds and its impact on me. Everything about this trip and this experience is so much more than what I could express through the next few sentences but I'll try my best to capture its essence.

From the moment I boarded the flight till I reached the top, I was haunted by a plethora of emotions. I have had my doubts about solo travelling, I was scared, missed my friends, felt helpless, confused, anxious, alone and what not. I even missed a stop while travelling via the Delhi Metro and had to take help of complete strangers, change 3 trains, and travel 30 mins extra to reach the right station. Sometimes, the journeys that you are so desperate to live, turn out to be the ones that test you the most. Despite everything, a whisper within me insisted that all this would be worth it—and it turned out to be SO MUCH MORE than I ever imagined!

Cut to the day of the trek. We started our journey to the top at 3 a.m. in the morning. As the dawn slowly faded and the sun shone, what began with energy, excitement, and playfulness soon transformed into an exhausting and seemingly endless climb. It wasn't long after our freezing bodies warmed up and began to sweat that the sky decided to bless us with rain – not just any ordinary rain, it was an incredibly heavy hail storm. The way was hardly visible and those chunks of ice hit us so hard that we had no option but to halt for a while. Half-drenched, completely wet shoes, and a trail blurred with fog added to the myriad challenges of this trip. However, the restless and determined cells in my being refused to tolerate delay and so we cautiously navigated the challenging terrain, slipping, sliding, and balancing, yet somehow managing to make progress. This journey tested all possible aspects – patience, will power, strength, focus, stamina. And so, I have put everything in me – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually – and just pulled myself to finish what I started.

7 hours into the trek, we still had a long way to go. It felt as if the destination was moving further away, reluctant to be reached so easily. As the day progressed, we split into small groups and slowly people started hiring porters to finish the trek sooner. After a point, I was all by myself and had to trek alone. That day, I experienced a crucial life lesson: no matter what, there are some battles in life that we must face alone, for companionship isn't guaranteed at every turn. And you know what… I did it. I motivated myself, I pulled myself up, I talked to every part of my body that was mind-numbingly exhausted and I took it as a challenge to finish this. And then, honestly, each step towards the top, felt like a step closer to belief, hope, and a deeper connection with myself.

It took me ~12 hours to finish the ~25km trek. When I finally reached the top, a gentle breeze whispered the spiritual echoes of the place. Under the moon-lit sky, overshadowing the huge snow-capped mountains by its magnificence, stood THE KEDARNATH DHAM. It was right there, in front of my eyes, fully lit up, surrounded by people and the entire place reverberated with soul energizing mantras. PURE MAGIC. There was so much chaos around, yet it felt so peaceful. As soon as I saw the temple, some unknown feeling crawled all across my body. I didn't know what that was (I still don't know) but it made me want to cry. All the struggle, exhaustion, restlessness, pain and every feeling that troubled me just came rolling out of my eyes. I stood at a distance, behind the bustling crowd, captivated by the view, my gaze fixed on the visible portions of the temple with rapt fascination. My body went numb and all my pain faded into the background of my mind. I didn’t want to move, even to step into the temple. All I wanted was to stand there and absorb it all. I wanted every detail to imprint itself on my memory–how I convinced my over-protective dad for a solo trip, how I travelled with complete strangers who now became friends, where did I get the strength and courage to pull off this trip, how gruelling it was to trek non-stop for 12 hours in extreme weather conditions, the struggle to believe in myself, and the surreal experience of witnessing firsthand the views I had only seen on screens.

I've never been so religious all my life (I'm still not), but this place has some magic that is beyond you and me. And it is definitely far beyond my beliefs. It was an absolute privilege to have experienced the emotion of Kedarnath.

This was a very important milestone in my life for so many reasons. It was more like a challenge I had with myself. When life becomes difficult, I generally search for mountains to climb. I don’t know how the idea of visiting Kedarnath came to me, but I’m so grateful that I did this. This trip talked to me in a way nothing ever has. It illuminated the depths of my brave heart, self-compassion, and love that were somewhere lost amidst life’s chaos and my own apprehensions. It showed me that sometimes it might take a little longer, it might be extra difficult, situations might be so demanding that giving up feels easy… but you owe it to yourself to hold on, have faith and embrace this emotional journey towards fulfilment. By the end of the trip, I felt like a phoenix rising out of ashes (okay, this line is a tad bit extra and dramatic, but I’m still not going to edit it) 

With many more thoughts, emotions, stories, memories, and full of energy, I came back to this concrete world. For the next two days, my legs were swollen like big fat potatoes, but that sense of accomplishment was beyond the world for me. I will always cherish this journey and especially those words that I whispered to myself after the trek: “I’m proud of you, Pranathi. For every step, both big and small, for every rise, for every fall, for every smile, for every tear shed… I’m proud of you for gracefully going through it all.”